I John 4:18-19There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us.
In this article–I want to look at the biblical idea that as humans–Fear is at the root of many our sexual struggles & sins; but that Jesus is the answer to any and every one of our sexual struggles and that the primary weapon he uses to defeat sin and specifically sexual sin–is LOVE. But God’s love isn’t just any love…it’s perfect love. Unconditional love. Love that covers a multitude of sins.
Maybe your asking: “What does fear have to do with sexual struggles?”
First–I want to look at some of the things that FEAR can cause in us:
1) Fear brings confusion—when we’re afraid—we get confused—and disoriented our senses get messed up—we can’t see clearly—we can’t hear clearly—we can’t think clearly. That’s why in a scary—dangerous situation—you hear people say—”It all happened so fast”
Which brings us to the next thing:
2) Fear causes us to make impulsive decisions—when we’re afraid and confused—we act based on our instincts–we act on human nature—we don’t act on wisdom— we act on emotions—
Unfortunately– the bible teaches us our nature inclinations are sinful—and selfish—and so often when we act in fear we—act on emotions and when we act emotionally—and selfishly and sinfully.
And so we find ourselves in a messed up place—having made messed up choices—and needing help. But the enemy’s smart—he knows that not only does fear bring confusion—and not only does he know we make crazy decisions when we’re afraid–he knows that….
3) Fear causes us not to trust—so often when we’ve made a crazy decision out of fear—it’s our tendency to cling to it and hold on to it—and we isolate ourselves out of shame.
Deep down–we know it’s not the right choice—but bc we’re afraid of having to admit we sinned and having to admit we’re struggling—we shut people out—the ones we’re supposed to be able to trust.
So now not only are we afraid—and confused—and caught in sin—we’re alone—and isolated from the people God has called to cover us and protect us and guide us through life. So often we cling to sinful situations—paralyzed—unable to let go and trust the people that God’s given us to help us—and lead us–and correct us.
This is scary–because the reality is—it reveals why the enemy has used the attack of fear—in the area of your sexuality.
Maybe it sounds something like this:
1) He’s told you there’s something wrong with you if you’re not in a physical relationship
2) He’s told you that your identity—your popularity is dependent on being in a relationship
3) He’s told you that it’s not OK to be alone—that you need someone
4) He’s told you to make decisions based on your emotions—based on your instincts
5) He’s told you—you can’t trust your parents—you can’t trust your pastors—you can’t trust God
BC—they’re all going to judge you and crush you and reject you and let you fall
6) He’s told you that God’s boundaries on SEX are to rob you of fulfillment and love and pleasure
7) Some of you are holding onto sin and struggles and addictions—but the enemy has told you can’t let go—BC you can’t trust people and you can’t trust GOD
He’s planted these seeds of fear in you in the area of sexuality in your generation—and as a result—there has never been a more sexually confused generation in America.
Because of the fear—and the confusion associated with sexual struggles–there has never been a more sexually impulsive generation in America.
So many walk in confusion when it comes to their sexual identity—it’s become about pleasure instead of purity. This is tragic, because God designed purity to bring pleasure.
Some of you walk in confusion when it comes to your sexual orientation—the enemy has knocked you off target and tempted you with attraction to someone of the same sex.
There has never been a generation—more untrusting of their parents—more untrusting of their spiritual leaders. The enemies attack of FEAR on our generation’s sexuality is working—bc so many in your generation are confused and impulsive and untrusting
And the REALITY is that many are clinging to struggles hanging on the side of a mountain-afraid of falling–but unwilling to let go of struggles–because they’s afraid to let go and trust people–afraid to trust God.
So many of you are confused and clinging to hurts and mistakes and secrets and broken hearts because of sexual struggles. Lust—Promiscuity—Same Sex Attraction—Pornography
The only thing that can break the bondage of fear and confusion and temptation and struggle is the love of a FATHER—the love of Jesus–the power of the Cross. There is no stronger, more complete, more clear depiction of love than the Cross.
Remember the words of I John 4:18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.
Love is the weapon that Jesus uses to defeat sexual struggles in our lives.
The Father is reaching out to you—and saying give me your struggles—give me your fear—give me your insecurities—give me your confusion—YOU CAN TRUST ME.